Its official I am a definite embarrassment. I have suspected that this is the case for some time, but today when I took older boy to a football trial, it was crystal clear. I was not so politely requested to not speak to anyone unless they speak to me first. Furthermore, I was explicitly told not to embarrass him.
Here, I must point out that much as he loves me, older boy has never exactly been a doting Son who will never leave my side and wants to spend lots of time with me. On the whole, I have always seen this as a positive trait, although when older boy at age 2 cried cause he had to leave a crèche and come home with me , I did get a funny look or two. Around this time I decided to take his independence as a sign of confidence and security, even if he did refuse to sit with me on the bus as soon as he was old enough to be out of a pushchair. I think its fair to say that in those days actions spoke louder than words.
In recent weeks older boy has come out of school, asked me for the house key and insisted that I wait in the playground with younger boy for five minutes so that he can be well ahead of us on the journey home. I have duly complied with this, although it goes against my Motherly instinct of wanting to track his whereabouts.
After today’s request, I asked him why and I was told that I had embarrassed him by saying “hi guys” to a group of his friends when we were on a rare occasion walking home together. Today I did as I was bid and settled down on the grass to watch his trial. I avoided contact with other parents and tried to be invisible. At the end of the trial, I received no complaints and chose to deduce from this that I might just have got it right.