See below a recent photo of my older boy doing some homework on the train under duress. What is it with kids and work, especially homework? I struggle with their lack of work ethic, mainly cause like all Mums I have so much to do in so little time. When asked to do their homework, the answer is always later or after I have I watched this, eaten this, or I’ll do it tomorrow or I’ll do it at homework club. It drives me mad cause I just have this fear that it will not get done, said boy will get in trouble and if I’m being really honest, it will reflect on me as a Mum, cause I imagine that a teacher would think “what sort of Mum is she, she cannot even persuade her kids to do their homework, why can’t she make the time?” Obviously I understand this to an extent, pre kids if I had been a teacher, I’m sure I would have thought the same thing. However mixed in with this is the realisation (especially when they are approaching High School age like older boy) that kids need to take responsibility and maybe sometimes as a parent you need to let them get into trouble in order for them to learn. This is difficult as a parent and so far I have only managed to do this once.
Nearly a year ago, older boy had a project to do, terrible Mother that I am, I cannot remember the subject matter, but I do remember a lot of cajoling. Eventually older boy decided to do a fact find, but unfortunately he didn’t find many facts. The finished creation was basically a sheet of A4 with a few facts written on the top half of it. As if this wasn’t bad enough, older boy then decided to cut the piece of paper in half and make it shorter at the side. His project actually fitted in a small envelope. I was stressed but decided to let him hand it in and take the wrath. Nothing terrible happened, apart from older boy having some very limited feedback on his project
However, I have known lots of people in my time who have achieved good results and done well for themselves, despite being on the lazy side and having the tendency to work towards deadlines at the last-minute. Part of me hopes that older boy will be one of those people and if that is the case I know that I need to step back and let him find his way, one of the hardest aspects of parenthood. I will just need to have faith.